habit

You.

Take care of yourself.

I used to hate it when people told me to be "kind to myself".

Like. Hate. It.

It sounded too gentle.

I would think "YEAH GREAT! But how am I supposed to get SHIZ DONE?!"

If I am over here being "gentle with myself" how am I supposed to pay my bills, get to the gym, interact with friends, pursue side projects, cook dinner, plan things, go to sleep, wake up and do it all again? PLUS! What about errands? Who has time for gentle when I need to get to the Post Office, when I just ran out of dishwashing soap, my shoes are wrecked, I need a haircut, AND I have nothing in my fridge?

WHEN AM I SUPPOSED TO FIND THE TIME TO BE GENTLE WITH MYSELF?

Answer: Never.

And then I would get a break. And I would get sick. Everything would set in and I would get terribly sick, full of all the ill, and not having much fun.

I felt like everything was on high speed. Do one thing to get to the next thing, to get to the next thing, so I can finally get to this last thing - sleep - wake up and do one thing to get to the next thing to get to the next thing to get to the next and so on. 

Until what?

Years of my life went by like this. I am not saying there were NO MOMENTS of joy or fun or pleasure, but the overwhelming feel was I need to do these tasks because I have to, because they build my life, and by doing them I will get to a more elevated place where maybe I won't have to do them as hard or as much? But right now in this moment I don't deserve to "be gentle" because I haven't earned it yet. I haven't gone to the gym enough, I haven't earned enough money, I haven't advanced in my career enough yet -

I NEED TO HUSTLE.

I NEED TO GET THINGS DONE.

So much pressure. It is a lot of energy without a lot of reward. 

All of that pushing and doing never got me further ahead. 
I was just numb. I felt comforted because I was busy, but I wasn't really advancing on my goals. 

My head was always spinning. I was constantly mired in thoughts and lists and plans and my life was just slipping by - I started to take care of myself more. I sought out acupuncturists, nutritionists, and naturopaths - but my mindset hadn't shifted. I had just added more appointments to my list of things to do.

I needed to believe I was worth the time.

That it didn't matter how much I had or hadn't accomplished.

That it was okay for me to slow down.

That being GENTLE wasn't being WEAK.

Which is why I kept myself so busy - WHO CARES if I am not achieving my goals, if I am not weak. Right?

I really had to check myself on that. 

Being able to be with yourself, kind to yourself, and allow yourself what you need to take care of you is STRENGTH. It makes you the kind of person that CAN help others. 

It is an amazing skill. And so I urge you -

Be kind.

Be gentle.

And slow down. 

WRITE. IT. DOWN.

On paper. 

I have said it before and I will say it again (and probably again) but there is a beautiful simplicity in taking pen to paper.

Example.

I have a bar hanging above my doorway. I would like to spend time ON that bar hanging from it, doing lat pulls, practicing pull-ups etc.

Maybe... I will take action and do these things because the bar exists. Maybe.

There is only one way to ensure that I take action.

Writing it down.

I mentioned this technique on an earlier post on how I got to my first pull-ups. It is so simple.

So perfect.

So easy.

What do you say you want to do, but don't?

Have you tried writing it?

 

Breakfast OMM NOM NOM!!

"The most important meal of the day... not to screw up. "

These are the words of Dr. Cate Shanahan who was the awesome doc to completely revolutionize the Lakers' diet. Which is a pretty great story. There are people in this world that can eat ANYTHING and still perform better than most people, but(!) are they performing at their best potential? I will leave you with that thought and refocus on the bfast times.

BREAKFAST.

Nom. Nom. Blood sugar crasshhhhhhing!

Nom. Nom. Blood sugar crasshhhhhhing!

Dude. You guys. This is important. This flavors your WHOLE day. This starts the decision making process of making nutritious choices that come easily or not so nutritious choices that seem to be made for us.

THEY BROUGHT IN TOP POT DOUGHNUTS! WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DOO?

Solid question. 

Answer: Don't. Eat. 'Em. 

I know! It is rough, like super duper rough, but the only way to form the habit of NOT is by NOT. Now, I want to remind you we are JUST tackling breakfast right now. Just breakfast.

(I am not going to touch on the pizza that comes in later in the day... yet.)

Now. I want to be clear EVERYONE is an individual and there is no everyone must do! That said, there are some general principles that tend to deliver benefit consistently.

So, what are you saying Annette?

1) Eat Breakfast - it doesn't need to be huge, but if you are experiencing lower energy, more cravings, and lack of willpower in your day... eat breakfast.

Men - you have more leeway here, you lucky guys can often operate from a fasted state and do okay.

Women - eh, most of you perform better with a bit of protein in the morning. Truth.

2) Eat Protein and Fat. Only. No fruit, no grain, no fruit juice, no juice, no smoothie, no yogurt, no granola, I'd personally avoid nuts too!

Okay, okay you can have veggies too if you'd like them - just nothing that is sugar dense. 

Choose high quality protein (e.g. grassfed and finished) and high quality fat (coconut oil, butter, MCT, ghee, etc). 

Try it out, see how you feel. I am not saying your plain greek yogurt is bad or that your super organic natural nutty granola is terrible, I am saying I have seen HUGE benefit when people switch it up and start with protein and fat.

So, I recommend you test it. Try it for ten days! Note how you feel, see if you like it.

If not, DO AS YOU PLEASE!

If so... well, you're now informed and DO AS YOU PLEASE!

It really is all about you. 

If you want more info, have questions, or just want to chat hit the button below and be whisked away to my coaching area where you can also send me a rad message.



#PAUSEDAILY

Hey, what're you doing? Stop. Breathe. 

You guys. 

It is so important to take a moment and just stop. Look around. Be aware. Where are you, what's around you, how do you feel?

We move so fast through everything.

Do this, then that, then that, and what am I having for dinner tonight... do I need to stop at the store? Wait no I don't, but right when I get home I'm going to have to take out the meat and SHOOT I DO NEED TO STOP I don't have any salt, shoot! Oh and I need to send that email... and... oh wait... it's the 2nd I need to pay rent!

Whoa. So many thoughts. Lists. To-dos. All the time. It is easy to bubble up and not take in what's around and this is OK, but do you know how magical it is to just pause?

Stop for a second. Settle your brain. Breathe in and look around.

Disconnect from all the shoulds, needs, have tos, and did Is - and just appreciate the present moment for the space of a breathe.

Pause. 

Daily. 

It is like the most awesome, lightweight, impactful, meditation you can do.

What Happens First?

Yesterday I brought up belief. 

I mentioned that belief drives behavior which drives results.

Think about that. 

I mean really take a moment to consider it. 

What are your behaviors?

What are your beliefs?

Does changing your behavior also change your belief, or do you always need to start at belief?

For me it was really a combination of both. By shifting my behaviors I had more space to question what I believed.

Whoa. What do I mean by that?

YEA YEA YEA Annette - WORDS! What do your WORDS MEAN?

Ok. What I mean is the relationship between how you feel and what you put in your mouth. Sugar is killer for me. As I mentioned in the last post it is like pure cocaine for my body and sugar begets sugars - meaning the more you eat the more you want to eat. When I am consuming sugar my brain is less happy. I am less likely to make good choices and I actually don't even really care because I am feeling pretty crappy. In this frame of mind I could give a flying eff about beliefs and results. I don't have energy to care, I don't think anything will change EVER because things feel hopeless. 

Let's level set here. 

I am not going to feel this way from one square of Dove chocolate, but in general if I am going on a bad food bender I am leading myself inevitably down a path of low grade depression. And when you are in that kind of muck everything seems SO very hard. 

My point?

The behavior had to shift for me to be able to get the space in my brain to reflect on what I actually care about. 

Tomorrow I will delve into this further. 

Spoiler: It is all about food. 

 

STOP.

About 6 maybe 7 years ago I was in a play.

It was a really bad play, but we had established an amazing sense of community. Our rehearsals were physical and long and we'd often bring snacks to share. It was around Easter and my FAVORITE in the whole world candy - ROBIN'S EGGS - were available. They are an amazing blend of malted milk ball and candy shell they just melt with such a wonderful sugary burst on the tongue - it is incredible. 

So these candies were there and I was NON STOP moving candy from bag to mouth. Oh the joy of mass consumption! After about 10 the joy was fading and the sickness was setting in, but I really didn't want to stop. WHY STOP? The pleasure of pure refined bliss was just moments away!!

I remember turning to a fellow cast member explaining this and he just looked at me and was like - "Annette. Just stop." 

HA. I thought, HA. I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW I SHOULD! 

But I really didn't feel like I had control. Their mere physical presence spurred me on. If they existed where I existed HOW WAS I TO NOT CONSUME THEM?! WHO AM I!? A FICTIONAL CHARACTER THAT MAKES CHOICES BASED ON HEALTH?? HA! SCOFF! HA!

Lately, I have been reflecting a lot on moments like this from my past and wondering what has shifted from then to now? What actually allowed me to stop?

Knowing I should stop, wasn't the thing.

Wanting to stop, wasn't the thing.

Having a logical understanding that 30+ Robin's Eggs is not the way to a trimmer waistline and a greater sense of wellbeing, also was not the thing.

I love the phrase "simple, not easy" and that pretty much sums it up. The way I got from point A to point B wasn't revolutionary, but it did take a lot of self discovery and a lot of understanding of what motivates my choices. 

Belief drives behavior which drives results - so what was I truly believing? And how could I shift that belief to be in-line with  my actual priorities? And how could I create an environment to support the results I wanted?

What things do you do that you KNOW you shouldn't be doing, but feel powerless to stop?

What are you actually believing?

 

 

What Do You Struggle With?

You are awesome.

You have value just being you sitting there reading this post. You don't need to do anything more than exist to already be winning today. 

What I am curious about is what do you struggle with? 
What are the lifestyle changes you'd like help with? 
What do you need support on?

Give me a word, a sentence, a story. I'd love to hear from you.

It is easy to think that everyone is like me, they struggle with what I struggle with, they'd like help where I'd like help and then I remember... NOPE.

Everyone has their own challenges and priorities and asking is the only way to know what actually matters.

You rock. Let me know how I can help you rock MOAR.

A.